Magus kills iCarly
by Shadow Aura 64
Summary: Magus brutally murders the iCarly cast. Contains excessive violence, and poor writing.
1. Loomings

By Shadow Aura 64

I do not own Chrono Trigger (Damn it) or iCarly (Thank God).

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Crono jumped into the air, swinging his katana down. Frog blocked it with his own sword, and tried to counter. Crono jumped back, and fired a bolt of lightning at the amphibious knight. Frog managed to dodge the magic attack, and used the Masamune to vault himself into the air. He brought the sword down on Crono, who used his katana to block it. Frog jumped back, and resumed his fighting stance. Both swordmen were panting heavily.

"Shall we call it quits for now?" Frog asked. Crono nodded. "You have improved," Frog said as they walked over to Marle and Robo. Crono smiled.

"How'd it go?" Marle asked.

"Good, very good," said Frog. Crono looked around. Gaspar was at his usual post, snoozing as always. Magus was standing at the edge of the End of Time, staring into the nothingness.

"Lucca and Ayla have taken the Epoch, and are exploring time," said Robo, as if reading Crono's thoughts. Right on cue, there was a flash, and the Epoch appeared. Crono and Marle started to walk over to it, when the doors flew open, and Lucca and Ayla scrambled out. Lucca immediately tripped over, and Ayla sprinted towards the pole in the middle of the End of Time, clutching it for support.

"What happened?" Marle asked. Lucca slowly got up. Crono handed his friend her glasses, which had fallen off when she tripped.

"We... We just got back from 2007..." Lucca said.

"And?" said Marle.

"We defeated Lavos in 1999," said Robo. Lucca shook her head.

"That's not it..." she said. "Lavos is nothing compared to this..." Ayla slowly rocked back and forth.

"What did you two see?" inquired Frog. Tears started to form in Lucca's eyes.

"It was horrible..." she said. "In 2007, television... No, the entire entertainment industry... Will be tainted by an unholy presence..." Crono tilted his head in confusion.

"What is this evil?" asked Frog.

"iCarly..." Lucca whispered. Ayla whimpered, and Lucca burst into tears.

"Never heard of it," said Marle.

"Then you're lucky," sniffed Lucca. "It's unbearable... Quite possibly, the worst thing that has ever existed, ever."

"Aren't you overreacting?" said Robo. Lucca shook her head.

"Its awfulness is incomprehensible," she said. "Ayla watched it for fifteen seconds and almost died." Crono looked at Ayla, who was trying to eat the floor. "She's gone insane," Lucca said sadly, wiping her eyes.

"We have to stop it!" said Marle.

"But how?" asked Robo.

"I say we go to 2007, and dispatch the fiends!" said Frog, raising the Masamune.

"Genius!" said Marle. Crono shook his head.

"Crono is right," said Robo. "How do we beat them? Look what they did to Ayla. We need someone with immeasurable mental strength."

"That'd be me." Everyone (except Ayla, who was trying to lick her elbow, and Gaspar, who was still asleep) turned in the direction of the voice. Magus was walking towards them, scythe in hand.

"You'll do it, Magus?" Marle asked. Magus nodded.

"I've grown weary of standing here doing nothing," he said. "Besides, I haven't checked 2007 for Schala yet. Two birds, one stone."

"Magus is the recommended choice," said Robo.

"Are you sure?" asked Lucca. "They're beyond belief. I didn't think something so horrible could exist."

"Don't underestimate me," Magus said as he walked over to the Epoch. "Help me with this thing." Lucca and Robo walked over to it. Robo looked the machine over, and Lucca pressed some buttons.

"It'll take you to 2007, then bring you back here afterwards," Lucca said. "They'll probably be at Nickelodeon On Sunset." Magus climbed into the Epoch.

"Good luck!" called Marle.

"You better come back alive," said Frog. Magus nodded. There was a flash, and the Epoch disappeared.

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AUTHOR'S NOTE: So, basically, this is a short story where Magus destroys iCarly. Whoo!


	2. Welcome to Hollywood

By Shadow Aura 64

I do not own Chrono Trigger or iCarly.

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Magus looked up. He was in Hollywood, 2007. He jumped out of the Epoch, and looked around.

"Where am I?" he wondered out loud. There were many people walking around, and every so often there was a flash from someone's camera. "I'll finish this quickly," Magus said. He walked over to a man in a suit talking on a mobile phone.

"... The Hell are you talking about? It can't possible be over nine thou... No, you shut up!" the man was saying.

"Where can I find Nickelodeon On Sunset?" Magus asked. The man ignored Magus, and continued talking. Magus snatched his phone, and crushed it.

"Hey, what the fu-" the man started to say.

"Now, let's try this again," said Magus. "Where is Nickelodeon On Sunset?"

"It's in that building," the man said, pointing towards a large building. "Now, what are you going to do about my phone?" Magus simple walked in the direction of the building. "Hey! I'm talking to you!" the man shouted. He threw a rock at Magus. He tilted his head slightly, and the rock missed him. He raised his hand, and the man burst into flames. Magus entered the building, where a security guard stopped him.

"Hey, you can't go in there!" he said. Magus pushed him out of the way, and walked over to the receptionist.

"Where is iCarly filmed?" he asked.

"Um... Who are you?" the receptionist.

"Hm, you answered my question with your own irrelevant question," said Magus. "That annoys me." The guard ran up to Magus.

"Hey, buddy, you're not supposed to be in here!" he said. "Get out! And get a haircut, while you're at it." Magus placed a hand on the guard's chest. Electricity surged through him. The guard shook violently, then collapsed.

"Now, let's try this again," Magus said, facing the receptionist. "Where is iCarly filmed?"

"S... Second floor," the receptionist answered. Magus quickly climbed the staircase, and found himself in front of a door labeled "iCarly." He pushed it open, and walked inside. Several teenagers were inside, along with lots of filming equipment.

"Who are you?" one of them asked. Magus took out his scythe.

"So it begins..." he said.

* * *

AUTHOR'S NOTE: The carnage starts new chapter. Enjoy!


	3. Time to die

By Shadow Aura 64

I don't own Chrono Trigger or iCarly. If I owned iCarly, all the characters would be dead, and if I owned Chrono Trigger, well, I'd be too awesome to waste my time here.

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"Are you a new extra?" a young male asked.

"Not exactly," Magus said as he slowly walked forwards. "My role here will become apparent in a moment. Now, let me ask you a question. Have any of you seen a woman with long blue hair recently?"

"Yeah, I'm looking at her now!" said the male teen. Magus' eyes narrowed. He stabbed his scythe into the teen's chest, and pulled it down, ripping his body open. His innards spilled onto the floor, and he collapsed.

"Freddy!" screamed a female teen. A young man ran into the room.

"What's going..." He trailed off as he saw the bloody mess. "What the fuck happened?" he yelled.

"That guy came in here and killed Freddy..." sobbed a female teen.

"Well, you've got no right to come in here and murder our friends!" said the man, stepping forwards.

"Who are you?" asked Magus, puzzled by his confidence. Actually, make that foolishness.

"Name's Spencer!" the man said, thumping himself on the chest. "And I'm going to make you pay for what you've done!"

"Come and try," Magus taunted. Spencer ran at Magus, and punched him in the face. Magus didn't flinch at all, and simply started back.

"Is that all?" he asked. He kneed Spencer in the gut. He fell to the ground, clutching his stomach.

"Spencer!" cried the brunette female teen. Her friend grabbed her arm.

"Let's get out of here, Carly!" she said. They started to run for the back exit, when Magus raised his scythe. A dark portal opened up in front of the exit.

"What's that?" the blonde teen asked.

"It's a Black Hole," said Magus. "Enter it, and you will die instantly. Then again, that would be easier for both of us."

"You can't... You can't do this..." Carly whimpered.

"Oh? I'm the bad guy here?" said Magus. "You're the ones tainting the planet with your horribleness. Your show is abysmal, mentally torturing those with intellect. The only people who enjoy it are brain-dead to begin with. To protect the ones that have realised your awfulness, I will destroy you!" He raised his hand, when a disgustingly obese boy crashed through the ceiling.

"Gibby!" said Carly.

"Who's this guy?" Gibby asked.

"G... Get out of here..." Spencer said. "He killed Freddy..."

"He's a monster," Carly sobbed. Gibby faced Magus.

"No-one kills my friends and gets away with it!" he said. He took his shirt off. "Let's dance." Magus looked away.

"Disgusting," he muttered. He pointed his finger at Gibby, who burst into flames. He ran around screaming, spreading the inferno.

"Aaaaggghhh! Make it stop!" Gibby screamed.

"As you wish," said Magus. He raised his hand, and Gibby was encased in ice. Magus clenched his hand into a fist, and the ice shattered, along with Gibby. The girls screamed. Spencer slowly got up, and steadily approached Magus from behind. He tried to punch Magus, but he spun around, and caught Spencer's fist. Using his scythe, Magus cut his arm off. Spencer screamed in pain as he held onto the bloody mess that used to be his arm.

"Stop that noise," Magus commanded. Spencer continued to scream in agony, bleeding everywhere. "Alright, I'll stop it for you," said Magus. He walked over to Spencer, and stabbed him in the neck. Blood splattered everywhere. Magus calmly placed his hand on the side of Spencer's face. It started glowing, and Spencer's head exploded. Carly fell to her knees, unable to take any more.

"Carly, we have to get out of here!" the girl said, shaking her friend.

"It's no use, Sam..." Carly said. "We're done for..."

"Listen to your friend," Magus said. "You must atone for your sins. Don't bother trying to resist." Sam ran at Magus.

"You monster!" she screamed. Magus sighed, and raised his hand again. Sam froze in mid air. Magus calmly moved his hand, and Sam floated over to the Black Hole. Her eyes widened in fear as Magus released her. She fell into the vortex, her screams fading.

"Let's get this over with," Magus said as he walked over to Carly.

"You killed my friends... You killed my brother... You killed my lover..." Carly said.

"Lover?" repeated Magus. "Who was it? The dork, or the fat kid?"

"What?" said Carly. "No, it was Sam."

"That... was more than I needed to know," Magus said, shaking his head. "Well, time to die." He stabbed his scythe into Carly's arm. Blood steadily flowed from the wound.

"Please..." whispered Carly. "Kill me..." Magus silently stepped back. He cupped his hands in front of him, raised them, then pointed at Carly.

"Dark Matter!" Magus said. Carly was enveloped by Darkness' shadow, and crushed until nothing was left. Magus looked around the room. All that was left was a few corpses, blood, flames, and a portal to Hell.

"Well, that was fun."

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AUTHOR'S NOTE: Gee, how crap was that? Long story short, I love Chrono Trigger, and I hate iCarly. Thought I'd blow off some steam. Feels good. According to every other iCarly fanfic on the internet, Carly and Sam are raging dykes, so I had to throw that in. I used the characters' names instead of the actors' in an attempt to avoid possible litigation. Anyway, please review. Tell me how bad my writing is; I welcome flames!


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